The Pugcess Diaries
by Kate13
Summary: The Princess Diaries through Lilly's POV. *Complete* *All that Princess in the Spotlight stuff removed.*
1. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter One

Author's Note: Characters? Not mine. Plot? Not mine. Diary? Mine. But idea? Not mine. Point of view? My adaptation of a character.  
  
Okay, Okay. It's just me rewriting Meggin Cabot's stuff from Lilly's POV. The Pugcess. Because Mia says Lilly looks like a pug. So I made her the Pugcess.  
  
Oh, yeah, and I hope you've read the book before you read this.  
  
~*Tuesday, September 23*~  
  
Mia's SUCH a dramatic. Though I realize that mother-Algebra teacher relations can be slightly traumatic, Mia's going insane. I mean, they haven't even had their FIRST DATE YET, and she's acting as if they've run off to the janitor's closet and conceived a lovechild.  
  
And if that's not enough, she's become OBSESSED with Josh Richter. I mean, we ran into him at Bigelow's, right? My mom needed alpha hydroxy, and Josh was buying Drakkar Noir, this really gross cologne. Does its repulsiveness even FAZE Mia? No, of course not. She goes and gets a free sample of it. To continue her dramatic agony, Josh greets her with a semi-smile and a "Hey." His synapses were misfiring, I tell you! Away from school, we're just slightly familiar faces. That's ALL. Yet away Mia goes, inventing drama and deciding that he can see her inner soul, generous and lovable.  
  
To this, I can only say one thing: Get a life, girl. You may be my best friend, but STILL!  
  
  
  
~*Thursday, September 23*~  
  
My brother is SUCH a freak. So Mia's over today, right? We're playing Boggle, and Mother's pulling that psychoanalysis thing that works on everyone BUT Mia? And Michael overhears that Mia's mom is dating Mr. Gianini? So, of course, Mia's TOTALLY freaking out about Michael revealing her little secret to the world. Michael starts harassing her, and Mia DOESN'T EVEN NOTICE. So Michael disappears back into his room.  
  
It's bad enough that he wanders around the house shirtless when my friends are here, okay? He doesn't have to start. ugh. flirting with MY friend. Mia and Michael-- now THERE's a match made in hell.  
  
  
  
~*Saturday, September 27*~  
  
Score. Today, one of the best episodes of "Lilly Tells It Like It Is," EVER, goes onto film. I call it. "The Green Witch Project," and it's all because I'm SICK AND TIRED of all the retarded tourists who call Greenwich Village, Green Witch Village. I'm sure everyone else is, too. By the end of the show, no one will look at Greenwich Village OR MetroCards the same way, ever again. 


	2. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Two

Author's Note: Just to reinforce it: None of its mine. I am in nonownership of just about everything in this story. Except the POV. Which is a Meg Cabot character to begin with, okay? Yes, my good buddies, the way Lilly writes sounds a lot like me talking. Surprised? It's just the way I pictured her in my head. I'd also like to thank the lovely people who reviewed me, Rhiannon, What's Their Name, and Rose Black. I really appreciate it, guys! Now to the rest of you, you'd better go write a review for me, too!  
  
Okay, okay, all you want's the story. warning: short chapter. Sorry, I have limited computer time now that my grandparents are in town.  
  
~*Monday, September 29*~  
  
Guess what? In the cliché of cliché's, our school has decided to put on a MUSICAL. Like we have any talent WHATSOEVER here. My Fair Lady, none the less. But, since you can only undermine a society from the inside (look at the Goths in Rome.), I've decided to be the house manager. What does this mean, fair Lilly, you ask? It means I get to flick the lights. Twice. At the beginning and end of the lovely intermission. But oh, think of the havoc and chaos I could cause with just one flick of the switch at the wrong time. violent thoughts. Must purge them from my innocent mind. Now there's a laugh.  
  
As much as I hate the admin for great stuff like our musical, I hold my strongest grudge against some of the students here. Like Josh Richter and Lana Weinberger. How long will I have to endure life with these people? They'll probably wind up being my clients some day when they've gone mentally insane from the stress of being such popular, stuck-up freaks. That'll be the day. but until then, Mia and I get to deal with their abuse regularly. Wait a sec. Make that, MIA gets to listen to their abuse and pretend it doesn't happen while I go in and defend the both of us. For once in my life, I agree with my parents. Mia has confrontation issues. For sure.  
  
  
  
~*Tuesday, September 30*~  
  
Great. Mia's dad is coming. Mr. Man-of-a-million-names. Many of which he shares with royalty in the principalities of Monaco and Genovia. Mia, however, has never noticed this, or has never shared. Probably just a coincidence. I mean, I don't think her mom, Helen Thermopolis, is directly related to that guy who got elected to Congress from California twenty years ago. But anyway, he's COMING. All this way. Something's SO got to be going on in Mia's messed-up family.  
  
  
  
~*Wednesday, November 1*~  
  
Just a quick note: Boris Pelkowski IS cute. AND a musical genius. Regardless of what Mia thinks. 


	3. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Three

Author's Note: Thanks a mil to all my reviewers. Let me know what you think of this chapter! Katarina, I read some of your stuff. it's pretty good! *too lazy to sign in*, I will get away from the book, don't worry. I just wanted to establish a background. Katy, if I don't get very much Mia-and-Michael stuff in here, I'm gonna write a companion that'll be Princess in the Spotlight from Michael's point of view. hopefully that'll turn out!!! Ax, I've added another lovely chapter for you to "review". until I hear from you again, *i want a hippopotamus for Christmas!*. She's A Star, here ya go!  
  
~*Thursday, November 2*~  
  
Mia was, like, totally gone today. She went racing off after school and I haven't seen her since. Oh, well. Her dad's here; what can I say? The child tells me everything, anyway. It's not like I'm not gonna hear about this tomorrow. Still, her mysterious side has never really been this secretive before.  
  
Actually, everyone around here's been acting like that recently. Especially my very own darling brother, Michael Moscovitz himself. For, like, the past eternity, he's been just shut up in his room, doing NOTHING. Nothing he'll tell us about, anyway. The scary part is, knowing my lovely family, he's probably either psychoanalyzing himself to a crumb or building a bomb with which to slowly destroy civilization. Somehow, the bomb would surprise me less. I mean, senior year is hitting Michael pretty hard. He's so ready to get out into the real world that all this doing-nothing- ness of 12th grade is really pretty pointless to him. So why not blow it all up? I wouldn't be shocked in the least.  
  
I think my parents know something about Ms. Thermopolis that I don't, because whenever I mention her and Mr. Gianini, they get all lookie-lookie secretive. It's sickening.  
  
~*Friday, October 3*~  
  
Could today get ANY worse? I wake up this morning because darling Michael sicced his sheltie, Pavlov, on me and conveniently drooled heartworm medicine frothy all over the comforter I only washed two days ago. Then, I go to meet Mia and there's some limo and a DRIVER there. And she won't tell me why. She says it's just 'cause her dad's visiting from Genovia and that she just looks depressed because of PMS, but, puh-leez, you can't fool me. Look at my family of psychoanalysts. I'm not like the English teacher you can pout at and say that your dog digested your assignment. Now she wants to spend the night at my house. Great. I really need a manic depressive freak at my house while I try and SLEEP. What is this child THINKING?????  
  
In other news, Michael's preparing college applications. He's sickening me with his shining SAT scores and perfect GPA. Plus his little webzine, Crackhead, gets him bonus points in the community service section. As if. However, he has one teensy little problem. None of his teachers have given him back their letters of recommendation yet. Not a single one. And little Mikey can't mail out his little applications without them. I tried to tell him he doesn't have to send them in for months, but he got all freaked out about being "in with the crowd." My brother's even more of a freak than I am. Ha. Ha. Ha.  
  
My adoring parents felt so sorry about this that they bought Michael some more memory for his computer. So here I sit, painting my toenails with a marker while I wait for Mia to stop arguing with her parents on the phone. I never, ever do anything with my toenails. At all. I'm scaring myself. I should talk about this on my show. Oh, wait. Showing feet=having to deal with Norman the Foot Fetisher even more. The guy's a sicko, so let's just forget about it. Marker, get back in my desk. It doesn't matter than seven of my toes are "electric lime" and the other three are still in their natural state. 


	4. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Four

Author's Note: It's me again, your lovable lil friend, *Mystery*Juice*2302*. I'm sure you've missed me sooo much. actually, I HAVE gotten requests for more of the story, but I still feel so unloved, so PLEASE r&r my new chap! Thanks a mil! Anyways. my computer is really screwed right now, so I can type chapters at home, but I have to go to the library or somewhere to upload them, so it may be a while sometimes between chapters. Hopefully this'll fix itself before Christmas Break, when the library closes and friends go away.  
  
..::*on to the story*::..  
  
  
  
~*Saturday, October 4th*~  
  
OK, I admit it, last night was fun and all, but every time Mia's over at my house, especially overnight, one thing LITERALLY drives me INSANE: my brother and my best friend are soooo dense!!! I mean, seriously. Michael's so obviously head-over-heels bowled over by Mia, and Mia's so obviously in love with Michael, but do either of them notice that the other is totally enamored? Nooooo. Am I even sure that they notice that they like each other? No. Of course not. The only place logical psychology falls short is in affairs of the heart. Even though it's my incredibly strong feeling that Michael and Mia would be THE worst couple, ever, they should confess their inner emotions and deal with the situation at hand. It's the only way they'll ever be able to come to terms with their tempestuous souls. No. The inner psychologist is coming out in me. Must destroy the urge. Psychology is no longer my field. I've decided to leave it to my parents.  
  
I haven't heard from Mia all day, which is odd, considering that she got shoveled out the door by my lovely mother and father just in time for me to get another of our favorite stalker lectures. What's wrong with an episode all about my feet? They're about the only attractive part of me. Well, minus my now-five electric green toenails. But STILL. I really couldn't care less about Norman the podophile. Give me a break. All I want to do is have fun with a psycho and flaunt my oh-so-beautiferous feet on public access television. No crime there. I guess their we're-psychologists-who- must-save-the-mentally-suffering-members-of-the-world complex is taking over again. See? Even psychologists have complexes!!! Even after I promised to leave Norman alone.  
  
I can't believe what they did.  
  
  
  
My parents are two of the most cruel people on the face of this ugly planet.  
  
  
  
  
  
How dare they do this to me?.  
  
  
  
THEY WON'T PAY FOR MY SHOW ANY MORE!!!  
  
I so need to talk to Mia about this. I'm not sure if she's mad about being kicked out, though, so I'd better wait for her to call.  
  
Then again, Mia hasn't had much of a chance to call, between my parents' urgent calls from three once-again-disturbed patients of theirs and, now, Michael's obsessive Crackhead-ing. If he had his way, the line would be busy for a million-and-two years.  
  
Oh, wait. Be right back.  
  
My psycho brother just "chatted" with Mia online. Says she's raving mad. His decent side actually shone through, and he's working off-line on a new article so I can call her. It's moments like this that keep me from killing Michael Moscovitz. That and the fact that I don't really think he'd mind. My brother is so anti-conformist that he'd probably embrace death, especially death-by-little-freshman-sister, as a way to go against society once again. What a freak.  
  
  
  
Author's Note:: Okay, that's all for now. Sorry. Please review if you want to see more!!! The main reason there's only a chapter up new is because I'm hard at work on another story, an epic songfic type thing. if you go look at all the other stuff I've written, you can find it. If you really love me, you'll review that too! :-)  
  
Love n nonsense,  
  
*me* 


	5. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Five

Author's Note: I'm back again! I'm really starting to have fun writing this story, so I hope you like reading it. Thanks to Erin, Ax, Squin, Ax, She's a Star, jess, starz, Ax, *Aubrey*, starz, Ax, and Squin for giving me reviews on chapters 3 and 4!!! I hope the rest of you will write me a review as soon as you're done reading this! Oh, and my songfic thing is getting there; I'm almost ready to post it. I'm starting a Harry Potter fic, too. Based on the book Sloppy Firsts, if anyone's read that.  
  
*Now for the story*  
  
  
  
~*Sunday, October 5*~  
  
So glad I got to talk to Mia last night. You know, she and Michael are the only people I can scream at and not feel bad about it. The difference? I scream at Michael about his problems; I scream at Mia about mine. I'm so mad my parents won't pay for my show! Is it my fault I'm being stalked by Norman, scum of the City? No. Is it my fault the public access channels cost money? No, you can blame that on the economy. That's an easy one. Is it my fault that Michael's got them in a bad mood by stalking around the house complaining about his nonexistent recommendation letters? No. Is it my fault the State of New York botched their records and my dad has lost his license to practice psychiatric medicine until the straighten things out? Of course not.  
  
Why can't they see this? They're the psychoanalysts in the family. They should realize that they're venting anger at outside sources at me, Lilly, the vulnerable little daughter. I'm only a freshman, and still legally dependent on them. That doesn't mean that they're morally dependent on me to keep their humours in order.  
  
Okay. there's got to be something good going on in my life. let me think.  
  
I've got it! The Cultural Diversity Dance is coming up at our school, right? Yeah, in a couple of weeks, to be exact. Okay, well, being the antisocial person I am, I have never, ever gone to a school dance in my life. Usually, I just stay home or go do something fun with Mia, Michael, and some of his computer geek friends. Well. this year, I've decided that I'm going to go. With Boris Pelkowski, violin genius of the G&T class at Albert Einstein High. And, being as liberated a woman as I am, I have no problem with asking him myself. No stress waiting for him to ask me! Yesss! 


	6. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Six

~*Monday, October 6*~  
  
  
  
Today was a boring day. I don't even know why I'm writing. We had a test in Mr. Gianini's class. It was easy--just the quadratic formula and stuff. I think Mia was cheating, though. she was all antsy and secretive, like she usually is when she's up to something illegal. Not that that happens very often, though. Okay, never mind, she must not have cheated, because she failed the test and Mr. G. wants her in for a tutor session after school. I think that her stress is due to her father being back. I mean, this whole driver thing is driving ME insane, and I only get a ride to school! The poor child. her father's only child, now that he's sterile.  
  
  
  
Actually, Mia's whole family is pretty scary. We were discussing both of our families this morning on the way to school in her dad's limo. The conversation went something like this:  
  
Me: "Your dad's really taking this whole infertility thing too far. Just because he can't have any more children doesn't mean that he should put so much pressure and lavish so many gifts upon you."  
  
Mia: (snappishly) "Oh, give me a break. My dad's always been like this. He's almost as bad as my grandmother."  
  
Me: "There you go. Bad genes. Your grandmother really is delusional, though. All that purple? She must think she's Anastasia or something."  
  
Mia: "Whatever. At least my mom's normal. Your whole family is psychotic in their own little psychoanalyst way."  
  
Me: "Yeah, okay, so my parents are kind of psycho. But you know what Tolstoy said: 'Happy families are all alike.'"  
  
Mia: (interrupting most rudely) "God, Lilly, you read too much. At least your brother and his webzine are a semi-normal force in your family."  
  
Me: "Michael? Give me a break. Just because YOU are madly in love with him doesn't mean that the REST of us are. Michael's about the oddest thing the Moscovitz family has ever seen."  
  
Mia: (defensively) "I am NOT madly in love with your brother. (Mutters something that sounds something like "But he does have a nice stomach")"  
  
Me: "WHAT??? What did you just say?"  
  
Mia: "Uh. nothing."  
  
Then Sven, or whatever the guy's name is, pulled up in front of good old Albert Einstein, and we had to go to school. A big poster outside reminded me that I had to ask Boris to the Cultural Diversity Dance soon. To tell you the truth, I have no idea why I've waited so long to do it. You and I both know I'm not one to procrastinate. And I'm certainly not scared of him saying no. I mean, me, Lilly Moscovitz, scared of rejection? Of course not! I'd just let it roll right off.  
  
  
  
Seriously.  
  
  
  
I mean it.  
  
  
  
  
  
I really, really do.  
  
  
  
  
  
Okay, maybe not.  
  
  
  
Maybe I'm just a little bit scared.  
  
  
  
  
  
Okay, a lot.  
  
  
  
  
  
What if he DOES say no? What would I do? After defending him and his violin for so long to Mia and Michael and everyone else on the Stuff-Boris- in-the-Closet-During-G-&-T-Class Committee, which is virtually our whole class, what would I do if he rejected me?  
  
  
  
  
  
Oh, God.  
  
  
  
  
  
How can I ask him now? Just writing about this makes me even more scared. Now I know why Michael (a) never kept a journal and (b) never dated any one.  
  
Maybe my big brother is smarter than I thought.  
  
Nah. No way.  
  
A/N: Okay. There you go. My new chapter. I've got another one, and here's the way we're gonna play with this one. Do you see that little box at the bottom of the page? Click on it and review, okay? Right now, there are 32 reviews on the first 5 chapters. When that number is 45, I'll post my new chapter, okay? Good stuff.  
  
Thanks to Ax, Squin, Lavender Ice, Cousin It, Gothic Valley Girl, and angellinda for reviewing Chapter Five. 


	7. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Seven

A/N: Hello again, my friends! 'Tis me, *Mystery*Juice*2302*! I feel the need to explain a few things and thank a few people.  
  
First of all, I'm sure you're all thinking, "This author-child is insane! How dare she put a minimum review number on her chapters?" So here's what happened. First of all, a certain little SOMEONE (no names here) didn't think I could get very many reviews ever, on any of my stories. So I had to prove them wrong, and that was the easiest way to do it. Don't worry, I won't do it again. I love you guys too much for that. ::snickers:: Second, school's almost out for break and I've had to be cramming for tests and going to study-groups and all sorts of great stuff, so I wanted an excuse not to write. Well, thanks a lot. Now I have to post this.  
  
Thanks to everyone who wrote me reviews, as provoked as they may have been: Cousin It, carissa, Bookworm, Meatball Head, Calliope, Ax, andie, Megan, What's Their Name, and CMM fan. Wow. 12 reviews in a day. I'm impressed!  
  
  
  
Okay, here you go.  
  
  
  
~*Wednesday, October 8*~  
  
  
  
Right now, I'm in a state of pity for the world. People in Southern Asia are starving. Another bout of hoof-and-mouth has spread across the British Isles. And here in New York, I've got a delusional brother living in my house and Mia has a delusional grandmother breathing down her neck. That's right; the crazy European Grand-mere is here. Gag me with a fork.  
  
Mia didn't even tell me about it, so I can't even say anything to her about it to offer comfort. I heard about it by listening through the wall on my parents' conversation after my mom got home from talking with Mia's mother. Yes, that's right. your "perfect" little Lilly was eavesdropping on secret conversations. Give me a break. I'm not THAT much of a goody-goody, am I?  
  
  
  
Don't answer that. I know what you're thinking.  
  
  
  
Great, great, great. There you go again, Lill. Giving a diary animation, thoughts, possessions, emotions. What kind of a psycho are you? Now you're even talking to yourself in second person.  
  
  
  
Obviously I shouldn't be writing. More tomorrow.  
  
  
  
  
  
~*Friday, October 10*~  
  
Yes, I lied. I said I'd write more yesterday. Well, technically, I said I'd write more tomorrow, but THAT was two days ago, so the day I meant was. oh well. My life is so boring I couldn't come up with anything new yesterday.  
  
  
  
But now, something a little bit more interesting has arisen. Actually, make that TWO somethings. First of all, my delusional brother has gotten even more delusional. Either that, or there's something Mia's not telling me. Michael told me he saw Mia at Einstein after school during computer club in a DRESS! (Preposition overload!) And panty hose! What is up with my little tomboyish buddy? This is SO not like her. Is she suffering some sort of post-traumatic stress disorder from having the psycho side of her family show up?  
  
  
  
My other interesting news is a little bit more productive, a little bit less tabloid-requiring. There is scandal, cheating, racism, and blatant prejudice, all going on in New York City. I know, I know, you're not surprised. This IS New York City, after all. But did I mention. it's all going on at "innocent" little Ho's Deli? Unfair pricing policies galore! Discounts ONLY to students of certain races-or, should I say, a certain race?!?! I've been cheated out of 5 cents on my gingko biloba puffs! And it's not like I can go anywhere else instead. The Deli is right near Einstein, and everywhere else is. not. Far away. Inaccessible to me in the short periods of time I have between school and... well... home. But that's not the point! The point is that the Ho family is taking advantage of the poor, innocent, non-Asian students at Einstein that don't have the time I have to travel across town to another eatery, or who don't have the sharp mathematical minds to figure out that they're being cheated out of their money. I must alert the city. This is one of those times when I'm glad I have a TV show. I feel like some sort of chivalrous lady of the Middle Ages, saving everyone in my town by fighting a crusade against unfair pricing. Well, okay, maybe it's not a crusade. I'm not doing it for religious reasons, and I'm not being racist. THEY are. But still, you know what I mean.  
  
  
  
PLEASE review!!! I'll write more soon. I'm on Christmas break at 2:40 tomorrow! Yay!  
  
*me* 


	8. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Eight

A/N: It's me again! Yay! I'd just like to thank all of my lovely reviewers: Bookworm, carissa, What's Their Name, Lavender Ice, Ax, FanFicFan, FrogAub, and BIBLEHERMIONE. You keep reviewing, I keep writing. It works like those "coupled channels" they try to teach me about in Biology. Luckily, I've managed to escape the insanity so far.  
  
  
  
~*Saturday, October 11*~  
  
  
  
I don't believe this! Mia's not going to help me in my quest against the Hos! And she won't even tell me why! What kind of a best friend is that?  
  
  
  
Oh, well. All good heroines work alone. I'm no damsel in distress.  
  
  
  
I still haven't gotten to asking Boris to go to the dance with me, but it's the weekend now, so I don't have to think about it for two whole days.  
  
  
  
Just because you don't doesn't mean you wo-on't.  
  
  
  
Get out of my head, imbecilic thought! You're not wanted here. I can--AND WILL-- ask Boris Pelkowski to the Cultural Diversity Dance. I am woman, hear me roar.  
  
  
  
Whoa. I'm even scaring myself.  
  
  
  
In other, more normal news. We got class ranks today from the end of last year. I'm still number 2. Argh. Who is ahead of me? Since the 6th grade, I have been number two. Yet no one appears to be number one. Some sort of phantom, usurping my rightful spot as valedictorian. In my opinion, there would be nothing worse than to be salutatorian. I mean, who wants to be number two when you're SO close to being number one?  
  
  
  
Michael won't tell us what he's ranked. I bet HE's number one in HIS class. That's the way it should be with ALL Moscovitzes. My mother and father BOTH graduated at the tip-top of their classes. Now I'm going to be the one to let them down. This isn't what I'm supposed to do. I'm the responsible one, the one they can trust not to let them down.  
  
  
  
Great. Stereotyping your role in a family situation is always a great sign of ~~~  
  
  
  
I hear someone coming. More later.  
  
  
  
  
  
~*Saturday, October 11*~ LATER  
  
  
  
That was Michael. Scaring me out of my mind for no apparent reason. Just wanted two things, my input on the newest edition of Crackhead and Mia's phone number. I'm not really sure which of those is more shocking.  
  
  
  
Since I'm on the topic, however, let's evaluate the situation at hand.  
  
  
  
Michael: A senior.  
  
Mia: A freshman.  
  
  
  
Michael: My brother  
  
Mia: My best friend  
  
  
  
Michael: A mouse potato  
  
Mia: A couch potato  
  
  
  
Michael: Our family is stuck with him, a freak  
  
Mia: Is stuck with a family of freaks  
  
  
  
They're total, complete opposites!  
  
  
  
So why are they so obviously secretly in love with each other?  
  
  
  
And no, I don't buy into that whole "opposites attract" theory.  
  
  
  
Maybe I'm making the whole thing up.  
  
  
  
But that would mean that I subconsciously WANT this to happen. And why? Why would I want my brother and my best friend to wind up breaking each other's hearts?  
  
  
  
Maybe they'd be better, being together for a while, than never being together.  
  
  
  
  
  
NO!!! I am NOT Lilly Moscovitz, Hopeless Romantic. I am the sensible one, the responsible one, the levelheaded one, the predictable one.  
  
  
  
I am the one who has stereotyped her character twice in one night's journal entry.  
  
  
  
Maybe I really do have some sort of split-personality disorder. 


	9. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Nine

A/N: Hello again! It's Christmas Eve and I'm bored, so here's another chapter for you. Thanks to my newest reviewers: Mellie, Squin, Lavander Ice, Bookworm, and Meatball Head. Now, if everyone would just drop me a review after the chapter, I'd love you forever ::smiles encouragingly at her absolutely lovely readers who she KNOWS will immediately shower her in reviews::  
  
  
  
~*Sunday, October 12*~  
  
  
  
WHY does life always do this to me? When I finally accept things how they are and warm up to prickly ideas. something like THIS happens! I had finally accepted the concept of my brother and my best friend MAYBE being perfect for each other and then.  
  
  
  
MIA! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, CHILD?!?!?  
  
  
  
Her hair was: brownish-blond; kind of mousy; slightly triangular; longish  
  
Her hair is: blond; very blond; very non-triangular; short  
  
  
  
Her nails were: kind of dirty; bitten off; normal  
  
Her nails are: clean and painted; fake; totally abnormal  
  
  
  
Her clothes were: school uniforms and thrift-shop finds; like mine; expressive  
  
Her clothes are: made by guys with French names; like Lana's; boring  
  
  
  
Mia was: predictable; individual; my best friend  
  
Mia is: unpredictable; a clone; some total stranger  
  
  
  
She even missed taping Lilly Tells It Like It Is today. Mia has never, ever missed one of my shows without telling me in advance. Her grandmother is taking over her life.  
  
  
  
So I advised her to be assertive when she came over last night.  
  
  
  
And she did. but not to the beloved Grand-mere. To ME, her own best friend. Mia NEVER acts like this. I guess she got some sort of brain transplant, too.  
  
  
  
There is no way I am EVER letting her NEAR my brother now. Michael, you WILL thank me sometime in the future, near or far.  
  
  
  
In fact, there is no way I am ever SPEAKING to her again. Ever.  
  
  
  
In other unsettling news, neither Moscovitz child is at the top of their class. Our parents will slaughter us when we get transcripts to sign and return. Guess who has beat Michael to the top of the senior class so near that lovely time when valedictorian is chosen?  
  
  
  
Hold on, I have to take a deep breath. I don't even believe this myself.  
  
  
  
JOSH RICHTER has beaten my big brother to the top of the senior class.  
  
  
  
For once, I actually feel like standing UP for Michael. I never, in my wildest dreams, thought this day would come.  
  
  
  
~*Later on Sunday*~  
  
  
  
I miss Mia already. My parents and Michael think I need to talk about this. I think not. The issue seems pretty clear-cut to me.  
  
  
  
There is no way I am going to initiate the whole making-up thing. This is all Mia's fault, so Mia needs to take responsibility and sort it herself.  
  
  
  
I have, however, had some time to think about Ho-Gate more now that I'm not always gabbing with Mia. I have, in fact, had a totally brilliant idea, too.  
  
  
  
Why not start a petition? Get the whole student body active!  
  
  
  
I need to fight with Mia more often. 


	10. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Ten

A/N: Merry Christmas Eve! Have another serving of my story! Yum! Unfortunately, my browser gave me a little bit of trouble when I tried to upload Chapter 9, the previous chapter, so the chapters leading up to this may have gotten scrambled. If you notice anything wrong, please let me know so I can try to straighten it out!  
  
Obviously, I have no reviewers to thank, since I'm writing 2 consecutive chapters, but I hope that you will all write reviews so that I can have a nice long thank-you section in a few days when I attempt to finish this story off!  
  
  
  
~*Monday, October 13*~  
  
  
  
I feel so. independent. So liberated. So free.  
  
  
  
I got myself to school this morning, thank you very much. No limousine ride from Mia's European crazies necessary. Now that I've had time to concentrate on things other than those that involve Mia, I was able to draw up a petition AND make posters to support my boycott of Ho's Deli. Boris and Shameeka were helping me circulate petitions during the day (Michael, for one reason or another, refused to, though this didn't surprise me in the least), and I got a good deal of the footage taped for my show.  
  
  
  
That wasn't all I got on tape, though. Mia assaulted Lana with a Nutty Royale. Right in the cheerleader uniform. It was brilliant, and I would have been the first to congratulate her if we hadn't been fighting. But, since we are, I'm keeping this footage of illegal assault for use in Mia's future when she's involved in some sort of political war against my fighters of justice and I can prove that she's not the innocent she pretends to be.  
  
  
  
Whoa, I'm really getting carried away here.  
  
  
  
But it WAS fun to see Mia get pulled out of G&T to go to the principal's office. She had been working with Michael on improving her Algebra strategies, and he looked absolutely crestfallen when she had to leave.  
  
  
  
And she DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE.  
  
  
  
I almost pity my brother for crushing on someone so dense. But I don't, because he, too, is too shy to do anything about it. How naff.  
  
  
  
Not that it's uncool not to immediately approach someone you like. In fact, it's almost intelligent. Absolutely intelligent, in fact.  
  
  
  
Oh, how obvious am I? I feel so. odd. Why can't I just go talk to Boris about the Cultural Diversity Dance like any normal person would do? I can beg him to pass around petitions without even a second thought.  
  
  
  
I WILL ask him to the dance.  
  
  
  
I am Lilly Moscovitz.  
  
  
  
I fear nothing.  
  
  
  
I will do it tonight, before I lost my confidence.  
  
  
  
I am within reach of the phone.  
  
  
  
Here it goes.  
  
  
  
A/N: Cliffhanger! ::laughs wildly:: Don't worry, as soon as I post this I think I'll write another chapter, and, besides, you all know what happens from the book.  
  
Please review! 


	11. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Eleven

A/N: Yay! This is my THIRD chapter today! ::everyone cheers wildly:: I really hope you guys appreciate this. please write me reviews to let me know!  
  
  
  
~*Tuesday, October 14*~  
  
  
  
I knew this would pay off! I knew it! I confronted my fears and, of course, good things happen! Maybe I will be a psychoanalyst in good Moscovitz tradition. I'm beginning to believe in this stuff!  
  
  
  
I have a date for the Cultural Diversity Dance!  
  
  
  
Not ONLY am I going with Boris, I ALSO beat Mia to getting a date. Ha ha ha.  
  
  
  
Though I DID see her talking to Michael today. I don't think it resulted in much, though. I was making more posters for Ho-Gate and happened to see them chatting it up QUITE merrily. I, on the other hand, was not quite as cheery. My Ho-test is not going quite as well I as could have hoped. The Asian students--that is, those favored by the racist Hos-- are taking advantage of the discount I unknowingly alerted them to. The smokers (a.k.a., the A Crowd and various other Populars) have decided that their support of me was enough, now can they go back to purchasing various forms of Death in a Box at Ho's Deli?  
  
  
  
REAL women stick by that which they believe in.  
  
  
  
I will not give up.  
  
  
  
This would be a whole lot easier if Mia was here.  
  
  
  
NO! I canNOT think these thoughts! I am better off without Mia, more dedicated to my cause, more alert and more aware of the troubles around me.  
  
  
  
Shut up, inner voice/conscience/whatever you are.  
  
  
  
~*Wednesday, October 15*~  
  
NOW I know what's going on. And it took the Post to tell me. I feel so. naïve. So culturally unaware. So uninvestigative. So stupid.  
  
  
  
Mia is a PRINCESS. I knew I recognized her father's name from somewhere. I even realized that it was the name of the Royal Genovian Family. But no, I trusted little Mia a BIT too much.  
  
  
  
"Mia would TELL you if she were a princess," I thought. "She is your very best friend in the world. She would never deceive you like that."  
  
  
  
How naïve can one child be? And I'm supposed to be the WORLDLY one between the two of us.  
  
  
  
So of course, Lana wanted to sit by the newfound royal member of Albert Einstein. And yet. Mia turned her away. MIA. She's always wanted to be a part of that crowd, and I should know. She whines to me about it all the time. If I were a lesser Lilly, that would make me feel inferior. But I am who I am, so it doesn't.  
  
  
  
As for the "I am who I am" applying to Mia, I have to doubt that. I mean, she didn't even know half of the stuff that was in the article about her father and her Majesty in the paper today.  
  
  
  
Example: Your father is worth more than 300 million dollars, Mia.  
  
Mia's Response: This is trash. I don't believe it. Carol Fernandez is an idiot.  
  
My Response: Of course he's worth a lot of money. He's the head of a nation. How much money do you THINK can be amassed from the sweat of hardworking laborers in a nation with one of the world's highest literacy rates? These people CAN get pretty good jobs, you know.  
  
Michael's Response: That's wonderful. And to imagine that he got NONE of it from his people, who traditionally have never paid taxes or tributes of any sort. Anyone related to Mia has to be extremely judicious and loyal and generous, you know.  
  
  
  
If Mia had a higher vocabulary, she would know exactly what Michael and I thought of her after our nice long argument today.  
  
  
  
The rest of my life isn't that peachy, either. No one cares about boycotting Ho's Deli ("we serve racism with a smile!") now that they can become adoring sycophants** of our lovely princess.  
  
  
  
Gag me with a fork. Better yet, gag me with a scepter.  
  
  
  
**I would like to thank Mrs. Peddy and the lovely Vocabulary from Latin and Greek Roots book for teaching me such wonderful words. ::gags::  
  
  
  
A/N: Okay, there's more on its way. I just don't know if I'm going to post it today or not. please review! Thank you much! 


	12. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Twelve

A/N: Merry Christmas! I decided that I'm getting too close to the end of the book, so I've GOT to keep writing! ::grins ashamedly:: So. I wrote another chapter! I'm just kind of having this problem. Lilly keeps arguing with herself. I guess it's because she sounds a lot like me, and I do that a lot.  
  
To Sarah, Mellie, Squin, and JainaSolo2097, who reviewed Chapter 11 and such, a giant thank-you from me! Muchos gracias, as people down here in Texas say, or, as I say in French class and Canada (where I'm from), merci beaucoup!  
  
A special note to Mellie: You make requests for my lovely plot. There is one slight problem with this. it is not MY plot. It's Meg Cabot's. So tell her all your woes.  
  
  
  
~*Thursday, October 17*~  
  
I can't believe this. How can a haircut and manicure, no matter HOW much they cost, change a person so much? Mia has gone from being, well, Mia to being this freakish princess/damsel-in-distress clone.  
  
  
  
And I'm completely left out of all the action. This isn't what's supposed to be going on. I am Lilly Moscovitz, always in the centre of everything. Whether I'm filming it or doing it, everything violent, exciting, or attention-grabbing that goes on at Albert Einstein has something to do with me. Torturing foot fetishers, destroying relationships, getting people together, protesting unfairness, I do it all! The world is not supposed to be all about Mia.  
  
  
  
It's supposed to be about me.  
  
  
  
  
  
I can't believe I just said that.  
  
  
  
But I have good reason.  
  
  
  
  
  
Yesterday, the biggest thing at Albert Einstein was probably my Ho's protest. Despite its lack of popularity, everyone knew about it. MAYBE the Cultural Diversity Dance. Which one of the two it was doesn't matter, I suppose, as much as what it IS now.  
  
  
  
Mia Thermopolis, would you please come claim your crown as Most Popular Person at Albert Einstein High School for Thursday, October 17? Or would it clash with your majestic tiara?  
  
  
  
Who would've thought? Mia. number one on everyone's popular list.  
  
  
  
Even I'M in shock. I'm supposed to be able to predict psychological trends in people's behaviors. Why didn't I see this coming?  
  
  
  
I don't think anyone could have seen it coming. This is just so odd, so out of it, that it's completely unpredictable.  
  
  
  
But you're Lilly. You can predict the unpredictable.  
  
  
  
WOULD THE TWO SIDES OF ME PLEASE SHUT UP???  
  
  
  
  
  
Thank you.  
  
  
  
Still. I can't believe this. The press. Lana. Josh. they're all over her! LANA WEINBERGER and JOSH RICHTER are practically paying TRIBUTE to Albert Einstein's own princess. I feel sick.  
  
  
  
Today she let them sit with her, and, big surprise, all they talked about was the Cultural Diversity Dance. Mia thinks that I have no idea what's going on in her social life now that we don't sit at the same lunch table. The polar opposite is the truth; I actually know more now that I have everyone telling me things about Mia, hoping I'll use them in some sort of revenge against her of hoping that hearing of her tragedies will make me want to make up with her again. There's probably not a single detail of Mia's life that I don't know right now, between the Associated Press and the associated student body.  
  
  
  
Okay, so there is ONE. I have no idea if she's ready to be friends with me again.  
  
  
  
And that's all that matters.  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: I was looking at the book.and The Princess Diaries ends on Sunday. That means I only have Friday, Saturday, and Sunday to write! And then it's over! I didn't think this would happen so soon! I need an idea for a sequel. should I just keep going with this whole Lilly thing? Change POV's to Michael or somebody? Come up with an ORIGINAL idea for once? Please let me know by writing a review w/ suggestions or emailing me (schroeder023@juno.com) so I can get started on my next project!  
  
*me* 


	13. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Thirteen

A/N: What sort of strange addiction is this? I'm getting near the end of this story, and only NOW can I not stop writing? Gosh-a-golly-whiz, I am one odd child.  
  
  
  
I forgot Bookworm in my list of reviewers in my last chapter. Many thanks, Bookworm.  
  
  
  
~*Friday, October 17*~  
  
I never make lists. It's really too bad, considering that one would be perfectly necessary right now in my current state. So I think I'll make one. Face the world and be different, that's what I say. And look, it got me a date to the dance, didn't it?  
  
  
  
Things I Really Don't Want To Think About But Probably Will Do Nothing But Obsess Over:  
  
Mia: no longer single. Now going to CDD with Josh.  
  
Josh: no longer Lana-tized. Now going to CDD with Mia.  
  
Boris: distracting/unnerving me more than ever the more the dance approaches.  
  
Cultural Diversity Dance: tomorrow. Dear Lord, I don't think I can handle that!  
  
The Boycott: No one cares. So no more boycott.  
  
The Show: going quickly downhill without Mia. And no, I did not say that.  
  
  
  
Now I know why I never make lists. Nothing accentuates your faults and anxieties like just writing them down with little-to-no elaboration to pad them out and make you feel a little bit better about being so horrible.  
  
  
  
  
  
The worst part about it is this: I have no one left to talk about these things with. When I was really little, Michael and I used to be good buddies, talking about everything that went wrong. When he grew up and really became a GUY, Mia was by my side every second of the day, so it didn't matter that Michael wasn't. Now that Mia's gone, there's no one left to step into her place as Best Friend. Sure, Shameeka and Ling Su and I are good friends, and Boris and I are getting to become friends (and hopefully more.), but Mia was just. Mia. Something no one else could ever be.  
  
  
  
Okay, I'm beginning to sound tacky and angsty now. I'll write more when I'm in a slightly more cheerful mood.  
  
  
  
~*LATER*~  
  
  
  
Good mood, my big toe! Ha. I'm only in a worse mood now. I know now why I never try to work out interpersonal relationships. The more meddled you get in them, the less they seem to work out.  
  
  
  
If only I hadn't trusted Mia so much, this fight wouldn't be such a big deal.  
  
  
  
If only I hadn't taken Mia for granted, I would have made other close friends to help me get over this.  
  
  
  
If only I hadn't decided that our friendship was worth saving, I wouldn't have tried to call her house.  
  
  
  
If only I hadn't tried to call her house, I wouldn't have had to speak with her mother.  
  
  
  
If I hadn't had to speak with her mother, I wouldn't have learned that she was spending the night with Tina Hakeem-Baba.  
  
  
  
If only I hadn't learned that she was spending the night with Tina Hakeem- Baba, I wouldn't have this sinking feeling that Mia had moved on and replaced me, something I have a feeling that I will never be able to do.  
  
  
  
Okay, this is beginning to sound like those if/then statement stories Mr. G made us write in math.  
  
  
  
At least I didn't have to talk to Mr. G when I called Mia's house.  
  
  
  
Alone and neglected tonight, I sat on my bed and watched my own show, all alone. I have never, ever done this before. When I was my show, Mia watches it with me. That's the way it's always worked.  
  
  
  
Instead, I was left there, watching myself act like an idiot in my, and I quote, "crusade against injustice".  
  
  
  
These "stupid moments" were funny when Mia and I could laugh over them together. Now, they seem just plain. stupid.  
  
  
  
At the end, you could totally tell that my speech against racism and unfairness was taped about ten seconds before I sent in this week's episode. Why? Because I had no one helping me film my show to come up with clever ideas and mischievous ways to get my point across.  
  
  
  
Thanks a lot, Mia.  
  
  
  
I feel so mixed up. A minute ago, I was missing Mia desperately. Now I feel absolute rage at her. And all at the same time, I just want to forget her.  
  
  
  
I guess this is how I know this fight wasn't what was supposed to happen to our friendship.  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Okay, this chapter was more than a little angsty and pretty OOC. But that's okay, I guess, b/c I'll try to make up for it in Chapter 14. the 2nd to last. scary how fast I'm getting to the end of the book.  
  
  
  
I'm getting all these ideas, great and not-so-great, about what to do after Chapter 15. I think I know my basic plan, but you'll just have to wait and find out when I actually do it.  
  
  
  
Please write a review and I'll try to get another chapter up as soon as I can. 


	14. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Fourteen

A/N: Wow. more reviews every time I look. I feel so loved ::grins and beams with loved-ness:: So. I wrote another chapter. This is incredibly hard for me to do, as there is only one more chapter after this one in The Pugcess Diaries. Thanks to everyone who's helping me decide what to do next; I'm hearing a lot more "Michael!" than anything else, so I may venture into that. I actually BOUGHT TPD2 today; previously, I'd only read it a couple of times in those incredibly cushy chairs they have at Barnes & Noble and Chapters (now Chapters/Indigo) since I read it once in Canada and once in the US. international reader! That's me! Okay, so anyway. I think I'm going to write some sort of intermezzo to bridge my two stories together, and I'll probably just retitle this story and use it to hold everything, just 'cause it's more convenient for me that way. Okay, I'm really starting to ramble here, so I'll move on! :)  
  
Thanks to Calliope, Blondie, cat, Bookworm, whats_their_name, anonymous, and Mellie for reviewing Chapter 13. I really appreciate that you take what little time it is to click that box and write me a little note. the rest of you may consider doing that after this chapter!  
  
Now I'm REALLY going to the story!  
  
  
  
~*Saturday, October 18*~  
  
Have you ever watched one of those movies where everything seems to go perfectly and all the main character can do is sit there, smile, and sigh? And you think, "This could never happen in real life. Let's get some realism into Hollywood"?  
  
  
  
Well, right now, I'm sitting here smiling, sighing, and promising myself never to be cynical about those movies again. How long do I think that promise will last? Probably two hours at best.  
  
  
  
But tonight was PERFECT.  
  
  
  
I'm SO glad I finally got up the nerve to ask Boris to go to the dance with me. He was so sweet, not anything like Josh was to Mia (but I'll get into that later!). He didn't even have a sweater on that he could have tucked into his pants.  
  
  
  
Michael decided to tag along, which I might have hated a couple of weeks ago but was perfectly fine tonight. It was nice having someone old enough to drive so that we didn't have to take the subway, which we wound up doing anyway :) Ah, the cultural experiences to be found in New York City!  
  
  
  
We found this little restaurant in the Village to eat at, which made it interesting and inexpensive. The food was, quite surprisingly, delicious, which made me wonder why there weren't thousands of people packed in there. I couldn't help but wonder how Mia was faring at Tavern on the Green, either.  
  
  
  
After dinner, we went to everyone's favorite place, Albert Einstein High School. You know, it's not such a bad place at night, when there are no lockers to be slammed in your face and the decorations committee has wreaked such havoc on the "ballroom" you have to burst out laughing. I was quite enjoying making fun of the decorations with Tina until we saw the limo pull up. Knowing that Mia was there, I had this sudden inclination to watch, so strong that I couldn't stop my eyes from fixing on the grand arrival. Something like throwing salt in a wound, I suppose.  
  
  
  
I expected a regal arrival, Mia doing her part for the press despite Josh and his general idiocy. What I got was quite different, though perhaps much more satisfying. A failed kiss, a slap in the face, a press field day; it all seemed like something from a movie. And, quite frankly, it was wonderful to see Josh Richter go down in flames in front of the whole school, though the whole scene shocked me somewhat, considering that Mia is not normally the most aggressive person.  
  
  
  
Surely, however, it shocked Mia more when I went over with Tina to see if she was okay. It was, even for me, a pretty gutsy thing to do, I judged by the odd sinking feeling in my stomach. Suddenly, it dawned on me. I was nervous.  
  
  
  
Lilly Moscovitz does NOT get nervous. Not ever.  
  
  
  
No matter what I felt, I'm glad I got over it. Mia and I are finally friends again, much to both of our relief. Fighting was too hard.  
  
  
  
Mia abandoned Josh, or Josh abandoned Mia, or perhaps both, and she was a bit crestfallen about it at first. Luckily, I can help cheer anyone up. I choose, however, to use this talent rarely because there are some people I really like to see suffer for a while.  
  
  
  
Mia is especially easy to cheer.  
  
  
  
All I had to do was tell her that Michael was there, and she was off like a rocket. Figuratively, of course, because we all went with her. We talked about some really stupid stuff, like Star Trek and replicators, but none of that mattered to Mia. She's incredibly obvious in her head-over-heels crush on Michael.  
  
  
  
Michael seemed pretty oblivious to the stupidity of the conversation as well, if that implies anything to you.  
  
  
  
I know I said if they ever got together, it would have to be over my dead body, but. I take it back now. They DO kind of make a cute couple.  
  
  
  
I can't believe I just said that.  
  
  
  
In other victories of the night, Lilly Tells It Like It Is is coming back! Tina has decided that the library is a perfectly good resource for those trashy romance novels she reads, so she'll use her gigantic allowance to fund my show.  
  
  
  
I'm so happy. Not only does this mean I have my show back, but I also have achieved a rather large personal victory over my parents and can continue in pursuit of Norman, my foot-loving fiendish "friend".  
  
  
  
I've got my show back, AND I've got my best friend back. Not only that, my best friend will be ON my show in the next episode. If only I could hook her up with my brother, I think we'd all be in perfect, blissful happiness.  
  
  
  
Now, all of my friends and their dates and my brother and I are headed over to my apartment in Tina's limo. I don't know how I'm going to be able to handle having TWO friends with limos and chauffeurs.  
  
  
  
Right now, I'm going to say something I thought my sarcastic, cynical soul would never utter.  
  
  
  
I don't think life gets much better than this.  
  
  
  
And if it does, I'm not sure I want it to. I'm enjoying this, just as it is.  
  
  
  
A/N: Agh! Only one more chapter! Sunday. the last day! PLEASE review this, or flame me, or whatever you feel appropriate. I just want to hear from you and know that this story is reaching people beyond my computer! Also. I reposted Chapter 13 today because my buddy Mellie was so kind as to point out all of my horrible typos and mental errors. Note to self: Don't write chapters too late at night any more. 


	15. Pugcess Diaries: Chapter Fifteen

A/N: Well, this is it. The end of The Pugcess Diaries as we know it. For more information about what's coming after this chapter, see the Author's Note at the end.  
  
  
  
This chapter (and the whole story, for that matter) is dedicated to everyone who's written a review: angellinda, andie, anonymous, Ax, BIBLEHERMIONE, Blondie, Bookworm, Calliope, cat, carissa, CMMfan, Cousin It, Erin, FanFicFan, fatcat7462, FrogAub, Gothic Valley Girl, Hannah Gray, Hanspam, JainaSolo2097, Jess, Katy, Lavander Ice, Meatball Head, Megan, Mellie, Rose Black, Sarah, She's A Star, starz, Squin, *too lazy to sign in*, and What's Their Name. Thank you very much. please keep reviewing!  
  
  
  
~*Sunday, October 19*~  
  
  
  
I can barely write. I'm tired, sure, but that's not the only reason.  
  
  
  
Last night . . . wonderful . . . what could be better?*  
  
  
  
Everything's so HAPPY! My life is rosy!* I've got my best friend back, my show back, and . . . BORIS!!!  
  
  
  
I'm in love.*** With Boris Pelkowski, Russian violinist and guy of my dreams.  
  
  
  
All I can do is sigh dreamily. Boris is perfect.  
  
  
  
He had NEVER (?!?!) danced before last night, but being a violinist must put some sort of natural sense of rhythm and music into his heavy Russian feet, because he did just fine.  
  
  
  
I mean, he only stepped on my feet five times each song, MAX.  
  
  
  
And he's so sweet, and debonair, and cute, and musical, and lovable, and. PERFECT!!!  
  
  
  
Okay, Lill, you can shut up now.  
  
  
  
Okay, okay. I'll just leave it at this: Boris is perfect, and I'd better shut up before I scare myself with this eerie un-Lilly romanticizing.  
  
  
  
Last night, after the dance, everyone came over to my apartment in Tina's limo. (I have decided that limo-riding is the lifestyle for me. I know I wrote a bit about it last night, but I like this whole rich-famous-and- bodyguarded style. It's so . . . foreign. So exclusive.  
  
  
  
I guess that's the point.  
  
  
  
So we all ate and talked and played Mia and my lovely End of the World game until my father, typical miser that he is, made everyone go home just because HE has to get up early to meet with his tai chi instructor. How selfish!  
  
  
  
Well, obviously Michael and I didn't have to go home, since we're already there, and Mia stayed over to spend the night, so the three of us hung out for a little while and then Michael and Mia . . . disappeared. To his room.  
  
  
  
I know I said they were a cute couple, but I still don't want to think about what they could have been doing in there.  
  
  
  
Still, they ARE my best friend and my brother, so I'm sure they'll be their dense selves forever. I doubt the day will ever come when Mia will stop dreaming about my brother liking her back (which he does; that's the problem) or Michael will stop coming up with excuses to borrow stuff from me whenever Mia's over. Even though Michael's pulling up on valedictorian and Mia's . . . well, not flunking Algebra anymore, I think they're still both a little stupid on the romance front.  
  
  
  
And maybe that's a good thing. I mean, I like having Mia come over here to see ME, not to snog my brother. And I like seeing Michael weasel his way into talking to Mia and finding out about her via gossip from me. It's quite fun, in an unexplainable way, to see your big brother squirm.  
  
  
  
Oh, and speaking of valedictorians, I found out who's ahead of me as #1 in the freshman class.  
  
  
  
I don't know who it was back in middle school, but I suspect Phil the Pocket Protector kid, who moved away at the end of eighth grade. I never real though about Phil before because he's one of those people who's not really there if you don't think really hard about him. The only person who know much about Phil was the teacher, who gave him Advanced Calculus and the like to do and who he stayed after class to help every single day.  
  
  
  
But now Phil is gone, so I had no explanation for what had happened to my position. I should be number one.  
  
  
  
But I'm not.  
  
  
  
Instead . . . BORIS is.  
  
  
  
My little violinist is a genius.  
  
  
  
I don't know whether to hate him or like him even more.  
  
  
  
I think I'll choose the latter. He's too cute to hate.  
  
  
  
In other news, Mia and the royal side of her family are getting along a little bit better now. Mia managed to weasel her way out of "princess lessons" for a whole week, so she's happy.  
  
  
  
It turns out she and her dad signed a pact that states that she gets to spend the rest of her high-school years at Albert Einstein as long as she performs all these duties expected of the Princess of Genovia. These duties include spending Christmases and summers at the palace.  
  
  
  
There's only a month and a half until Christmas break.  
  
  
  
That's a month and a half that I have to get myself a charter plane ride to Genovia to spend some quality time bonding with the royal subjects and finding out their opinions on the meat and leather industries in the world right now.  
  
  
  
Oh, what does it matter? It's just my journal. I can sound excessively shallow here.  
  
  
  
I just want to "live" in a palace.  
  
  
  
There's nothing wrong with that, right?  
  
  
  
Oh, and back at the beginning of the month, when Mr. G. suggested that Mia try out for Eliza Doolittle, the lead in My Fair Lady? Well, I've been stage-managing that play long enough that I've figured something out.  
  
  
  
Mia doesn't need the play to be transformed. It's happened in her LIFE recently . . . I mean, come on, you see what I'm talking about, right? Mia's dad and grandmother are like that professor, picking her up off the streets of New York City and teaching her how to be a princess.  
  
  
  
These sort of things make me wonder how much, exactly, our dear Mr. G knows about Mia and her family.  
  
  
  
FOOTNOTES:  
  
*than being together, is what I cannot explain to Jane! (Jane, Barenaked Ladies)  
  
**I'm feeling comfy cozy! (The Happy Song, Hokus Pick)  
  
***I'm a believer! THEN I SAW HER FACE! (I'm a Believer, the Monkees)  
  
Sorry, I was having a little trouble there not singing songs that went with the words I'd just typed. We all know that I'm a spaz, so what does it matter?  
  
  
  
Okay, here's what's going to happen with this story, now that I'm done with "The Pugcess Diaries."  
  
  
  
I think . . . I'm going to write PitS (okay, I don't like that acronym. I'll call it TPD2 instead) from Michael AND Lilly's POV's, okay? I'm doing this because I REALLY want to write TPD3 from Michael's POV and I'd feel like I was neglecting dear Lilly by doing only one in her voice and 2 in Michael's. Besides, it'll take up twice as much time, meaning that I may not finish until TPD3 is almost out.  
  
  
  
So . . . what do you think of that? Please let me know by writing me a review or communicating with me otherwise. preferably both, especially if you're one of those lovely people I see all the time anyway.  
  
  
  
And so this is Christmas. Okay, Christmas is over, but that song just popped into my head. I love John Lennon.  
  
  
  
That said, adios until the next installment of . . . KATE WRITES PERFECTLY GOOD BOOKS THROUGH POV'S OF CRAZY CHARACTERS AND MAKES THEM SOUND BAD!!! 


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